Sunday, March 19, 2006

I don't know why I find it so funny, but I love it when Seinfeld makes up names.

Scene #1:

GEORGE: "Fragile Frankie Merman? I never liked that guy."
JERRY: "Why? He's harmless."
GEORGE: "Every summer you guys went to camp together. I was jealous. Felt
like he was the summer me."
JERRY: "He was not the summer you. Besides, you had a summer me. Whitey Fisk,
the guy who snuck you into Last Tango in Paris."
GEORGE: "I made him up."
JERRY: "So you never saw Last Tango in Paris?"
GEORGE: "No."
JERRY: "Too bad. It was erotic."

Scene #2:

(Jerry enters, with his bag over his shoulder.)

GEORGE: Hey look, he's back.
JERRY: I got your message, (sitting) so I came straight from Atlantic City.
HELEN: Jerry, Kramer called Bally's. You weren't registered.
JERRY: (extemporising) Well, I can't stay under my own name. I was registered under Slappy White.

The Pinball Wizard

Whenever I'm in a competitive environment, I think of the narrator from Pinball Wizard:

I thought I was
The Bally table king.
But I just handed
My pinball crown to hiiiiiiiiim

Even at my favoriate table
He can beat my best
His disciples lead him in
And he just does the rest.
He's got crazy flipper fingers
Never seen him fall
That deaf dumb and blind kid
Sure plays a mean pinball

Saturday, February 04, 2006

"Embassies torched as cartoon furor grows"

The recent Muslim anger over cartoons in a Danish newspaper, which were subsequently and gleefully reprinted in newspapers across Europe, provides us with a lot of funny headlines. Headlines that I never thought I would see. Here is a brief sampling:

Embassies torched as cartoon furor grows
Muslim Anger Builds over Newspaper Cartoons
Clash Over Cartoons Is a Caricature Of Civilization
Bono: 'The Lord Will Watch Your Back'

I don't know what the last one's about, but anyway, this is a funny issue, since it's just a cartoon. I would hate to see what would happen if a NYC art gallery decided to display a painting of Muhammad with excrement on it. (The Virgin Mary's okay, though.)

Thursday, January 12, 2006

Abdo's senior picture


That's definitely a senior picture pose. But I think most pictures of him are like that.

I don't know why Abdo reminds me of the guy from "Play a Train Song", but he does. And that fact deserves to be in writing.

Smokin' long black Cadillac, the engine's windin' down
He'd park it up on the sidewalk like he owned the whole damn town
I'd here him talkin' to some chick through a thick ghost of smoke
Through a thicker haze of Southern Comfort and Coke

He'd say, girl you're hotter than the hinges hangin' off the gates of hell
Don't be afraid to turn to me, babe, if a-he don't treat you well
And by he, he meant me, so I laughed and I shook his hand
He'd laugh a little bit louder as he'd yell up at the band

Play a train song, pour me one more round
Make 'em leave my boots on when they lay me into the ground
I am a runaway locomotive out of my one track mind
And I'm a looking for any kind of trouble that I can find

Well I dreamed I saw the silver spaceship flying in the yellow haze of the sun



This wasn't the height of things, but the entire evening had this other-worldly feel to it.

Well I dreamed I saw the silver spaceship flying...

I was lying in a burned out basement
With a full moon in my eye
I was hoping for replacement
When the sun burst through the sky
There was a band playing in my head
And I felt like getting high
I was thinking about what a friend had said
I was hoping it was a lie
Thinking about what friend had said
I was hoping it was a lie

Well I dreamed I saw the silver spaceship flying
In the yellow haze of the sun
There were children crying and colours flying
All around the chosen one
All in a dream, all in a dream
The loading had begun
Flying mother nature's silver seed
To a new home in the sun
Flying mother nature's silver seed
To a new home

I keep my volume at 23

The volume on my MP3 player goes from, like, 0 to 25. But instead of keeping it at full blast, aka 25, I like to keep it at 23.

See, if it's at 23, there's always room to kick it up two more notches when the music really starts to get good.

Banjo solo on "At the End of the Day? Exactly.